TRAVELING WITH KIDS - Chaos and Coffee Advice

It’s getting to be spring break time! Summer isn’t even that far away! Airlines are still recovering from COVID so you can find tickets for the lowest in years. Suddenly a vacation for 5 or 6 seems actually doable, when not too long ago it was financially out of reach. I’ve flown with my kids and all their crap a bunch of times now. I feel ready to give you the tips to make your traveling with kids as easy as possible!

Know your family

Why am I not talking about road trips? Because we don’t road trip. None of us handle it very well at all. Everyone is bored, car sick, and are suddenly the most overly hydrated kids ever, making us stop every 40 minutes to find the least disgusting gas station bathroom. By the time we get to our destination, everyone is crabby and I’m cursing my blind enthusiasm.

According to my Facebook feed, there are all kinds of families that love going on nature hikes, exploring scenic landscapes. They will spend HOURS looking for seashells on a beach somewhere. Those people looked like they were having the time of their life, so we tried it. Trust me when I say this trip was a complete and utter failure. We actually left early! I would have rather been at home organizing the closets.

So what’s our ideal vacation? We have learned through much trial and error, that we are a more waterpark-amusement park type family. We need activities and excursions and all the stimuli. That kind of vacation means we go on far fewer trips than we would if we enjoyed hiking or rock collecting, but when we do we really enjoy it and our time together.

Maybe you’re the kind of family that loves to be outdoors and can go camping or horseback riding somewhere for the week. That’s great! You might need an all-inclusive resort with a kid’s area. Don’t compare yourself to the families on your social media feed. Recognize what activities and what destination are going to be ideal for only you and your family.

Before you travel with kids

You are going to want to apply for a TSA pre-check. For $85 (good for 5 years) you submit to fingerprinting and a background check. If you qualify you don’t have to take off your shoes or belts and you don’t need to take your liquids or electronics out. Your kids can come in the line with you and it’s such a breeze. You don’t want to be fumbling with your kids’ tablet and your shoes while wrangling kids, carry-ons, and your passport or tickets.

If your child is not used to wearing a mask PRACTICE PRACTICE PRACTICE. They are not joking around with this mask mandate. They won’t make any exceptions no matter how much little Timmy hates his mask. I have heard of various ways people train their toddlers to wear a mask, but the one I really think is genius uses screen time as an incentive. Make the rule that whenever they are watching tv (or any screen) they have to wear a mask. They are less likely to fight it when it involves the enticement of screen time, and you’ll get your kids ready for travel in no time!

Download movies and shows for them to watch. Prep them that wi-fi won’t be working so they’ll have to default to their second or third choice for screen time activities. I know my kids would much rather be playing Roblox or watching Youtube, but they settled for movies and episodes of their favorite show, and Subway Surfer.

The airport

Check as many bags as your airline allows! My kids have those smaller kids’ suitcases that they put their stuff in. Those are carry-on sized and we could have brought them on board since all kids had their own ticket and everyone gets a carry-on. No. Don’t do that. You don’t want to worry about those suitcases and constantly checking that everyone has them and isn’t tripping over them. And we all know they’re gonna find it cool to roll it for maybe 10 minutes, then they’ll ask you to take it from them. My suggestion is to put whatever you need for the kids in a backpack and that will be their carry-on. You can wear it, and bonus: you get to be in charge of dispensing the snacks and tablets.

On the flight

Snacks. Tablet. Repeat. Oh you’re one of those families that limit screen time? Not anymore you aren’t.

The airport. again.

This is the hardest part for me. I’m tired because we’ve been traveling all day, the airplane makes me sick and my ears are plugged. I physically cannot be asked one more question or play another round of “paper rock scissors” before I lose my mind. And my temper. All I want to do is nap but we have to navigate another airport, get our luggage, and there’s probably more travel coming up. You might either have a rental car or maybe you’re taking a shuttle or a van somewhere. It’s a lot of downtimes and waiting. This is where I have to reach deep down inside me and find that last little speck of motivation.

We play ‘I spy’ while we wait at the luggage carrier. Talk to them about all the fun things you’re about to do to distract everyone from how crabby and tired you are right now. Talk to the van or shuttle driver about local customs and what’s going on that week. You can get the inside scoop and this is how you can find a great restaurant or excursion recommendation.

Don’t be afraid to bust out more snacks or the tablets again. There will be plenty of time for swimming, biking, or whatever you have planned. You are not a bad mom for starting this journey entirely dependent on fruit snacks and Youtube. That’s exactly how you’re going to survive until you get to the hotel room. Keep them happy however you can otherwise your trip will start with meltdowns. (ok, MORE meltdowns. Let’s be honest.)

tips for traveling with kids

Never plan a big activity or destination for the first day. It’s easy to think that you’re “wasting” a day of vacation if you don’t hit the ground running, but trust me. Let the kids explore the hotel room, plan on a swimming day or something else fun but lowkey, and get dinner. I like to plan to arrive late afternoon so there’s really no time for anything other than dinner and relaxing. We start bright and early the next day when everyone is bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. And after we’ve drunk several cups of coffee.
You can save luggage space if you’re able to buy necessities when you get there. If you’re going to visit family, or going someplace where there’s a Walmart nearby-you can skip packing diapers and wipes. The last time we went on vacation we went to a resort, so we had to pack an entire suitcase of diapers, pullups, and wipes. It would have been so nice to be able to just buy a pack when we arrived.
Discuss with your kids IF and WHEN they will be able to buy a souvenir. You don’t want to listen to “can I get this?” 50 times a day for 5 days. We’ve learned that if they’re going to get a souvenir, it has to be on the last day so they can’t change their mind or be disappointed when they see something cooler mid-week.
We also have the rule that they have to pick out something they couldn’t get at home. I love it if it has the name of the place we’re staying, or if it’s unique to that destination. Once we took them to a candy store known for nostalgic candies, and unique and different varieties of candy, fudge, and popcorn. They wanted Skittles. No. We’re not getting an overpriced box of Skittles, you’re going to have to try something new or nothing at all.

Relax

It can be easy to think that a few days or a week of indulging is going to translate to their home behavior. You limit their treats and enforce the same bedtime because you don’t want to bring little spoiled brats home. I am here to give you the assurance that they understand things go back to “normal” at home, just like adults do. There will be a little adjustment but aren’t we all like that? A little more tired for a day or so, really missing that frozen yogurt bar we had grown accustomed to. They will adjust and go back to their regular snacks and bedtimes, I promise.

It might even help your parenting to realize that you CAN have a different schedule for a while and be OK. The first time we traveled with kids, my daughter was about 13 months. I read way too many parenting books with her (first child syndrome) so we were really strict about naps and bedtime and what she ate. The resort didn’t have plain Cheerios, only Fruit Loops. She hadn’t had anything like that yet and I about had a panic attack thinking all of my hard work and diligence was going to go to shit that week.

She ate the fruit loops. Also, she only slept at really inconvenient times and often in someone’s arms at a restaurant. When we got home she went back to Cheerio’s and naps after lunch. It was fine. That was a really important realization for me and honestly, I think it really affected my parenting positively to see that the world will not collapse if you keep a different schedule for a little bit. Go and have fun!